Don’t expect aging loved ones to be grateful when we suggest or implement changes in their lives. Excuse me while I slip into my increasingly familiar role of an aging adult for a moment.
No one likes change. We have set routines, set ways to do things, habits we can’t break if we tried, and ways we’ve developed to do things, based on many, many years of learning to get it right. Regardless of whether another way seems like a better choice to others, if we haven’t decided on the need to change ourselves, other opinions will most likely be irrelevant.
The best way to get aging loved ones to accept help, or to even make renovations themselves, is implementing changes in phases. These correspond with phases of slowly coming to terms with the idea that, somewhere along the line, our wisdom was acquired at the cost of our agility.
Phase One
In the first phase, we remain fairly unconcerned. Others may see problems developing, but we do not. We see no reason to change our lifestyle. We won’t discuss issues, seek out information, or acknowledge any need. At this point, discussing changes is pointless.
Phase Two
In the second phase, we are becoming aware that maybe, just maybe, problems are surfacing that may be possible to counter. Perhaps something should change. This realization is often triggered by a bad event, like a fall with injuries. Now we are open to at least discussing options and solutions, to things we finally acknowledge may be issues.
Phase Three
By the time we enter phase three, we are ready to make changes and modifications. If changes are implemented gradually, resistance will be lessened. No more changes than absolutely required should be made. Establish ahead of time, what trigger events will precipitate which changes. Some changes in one space may require taking room from an adjacent space.
Phase Four
By the fourth phase, we are even making changes in our behavior. We will consider whatever adjustments are needed to remain at home. We realize a worsening of our situation might make that impossible. At this point, we will accept almost any changes that offer hope.
Using Kitchens as an Example
The book separately discusses various spaces and problems encountered, leading up to a home, moving into the public areas, and then into the more private areas. The following is the discussion found therein regarding kitchens.
Cooking
Cooking is, or was, a central part of the lives of many. Appetite somewhat diminishes with age and eating may become less enjoyable, but not continuing to eat the proper amounts of food will have devastating health consequences. Since the ability to go out for food will become increasingly restricted, enabling continued kitchen use will be important. What follows are a few suggestions on ways to make that possible.
Safety
Safety will always be a big priority in food preparation areas. Replace them if needed, to ensure that stoves don’t have knobs that initiate a flow of gas upon being merely bumped. If there is concern regarding a resident remembering to turn off the burners after use, induction cooktops are a great invention and worth investigating. Smoke and carbon monoxide detectors should be installed near cooking areas and tested regularly.
Appliances
All appliances should have easily understood controls. Push button controls are easier to use than knobs which need to be twisted.
Extra space may quickly be needed in kitchens to perform ordinary tasks. If a mobility-assist device is in use, it may not be possible to approach a necessary task location from the same direction as before. Found here are code-recommended clearances for using mobility devices in kitchens and dining rooms. These are the minimum needed spaces and clearances. Meet or exceed them, when that can be done.
Creating operating space for appliance use is a big part of adapting kitchens for aging. Doors needing to be opened, like oven and dishwasher doors, need available space to do so, even when the user is in a wheelchair. Verify there is room to approach and operate each appliance. Dishwashers should still be next to the sinks for ease of plumbing and for loading.
Countertops
Create open workspaces on countertops next to appliances, where dishes can be placed while using those appliances.
Altering kitchen components may be one of the most expensive renovations needed, to adapt an existing home to enable aging-in-place. Existing kitchen cabinetry may not work well for use by the elderly.
If extra support is installed for countertops to bridge across gaps, some base cabinets can be altered to become removable, to later create required knee space for wheelchair users.
Sections of countertops may need to be lowered or traded for adjustable versions. When finishes are removed and walls are opened, take that opportunity to provide support in the walls for varied heights of counters and cabinets. Adjustable height countertops with knee space below, work great when only one family member uses a mobility assist device. Others can raise them as needed for their use. An example of an adjustable countertop is shown here.
